Geez man, am I angry! I'm so damned mad, my caveman o meter is pegged at destroy! I am married to a woman who is mentally ill. Has been now for 18+ years. I get it aint her fault but does that give her the right to make me as insane as she is?!?! After 12 years, it finally hit me that she was never going back to who she was when we married. I spiralled down into a black depression, compounded when I severely torqued my spine, in fact I did it so bad my MD thought I'd had scoliosis since birth!!!!I tried telling him, no I hurt myself sweeping the ceiling of my old townhouse basement clean of cobwebs. It sounded so pathetic even now I wanna scream! So, I fell head over heels for her little sister, a white hot hottie whose interests,etc. dovetailed so completely with mine, I freaked bigtime. I really thought then, as now, my wife was gonna kill herself, and was I conflicted! I figured she'd die, me and little sis would get together with our kids and we'd be happy forever.Anywhooo I got to the line, and anybody out there who's ever had a serious relationship KNOWS THE LINE:adultery! And, I couldn't cross it. I had a major meltdown and took weeks of therapy to recover. I have been tormented for 6 years now by my wife, proving ole willy had it right,"hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" It don't matter that I never tried anything physical at all, even holding hands, I was an ADULTERER!!!!!! My stupidity drove a wedge in between them that never fully healed, and I've kept my head down as much as I can.See, I feel pretty stupid about this as I never would've behaved that way normally.My wife is deteriorating and what drives me right out of my fucking gourd is that her sister is still beautiful and single and oh boy is she sexy! So God may be a woman after all, becuase it seems She's punishing me for momentary insanity by taking my wife away piece by piece and showing me at the same time what could have been.I wanna puke I'm so angry. All I've felt for 6 years is guilt and rage. I'm so burned out I'm dead to normal feelings. I'm disconnected from reality. All I can do is watch life slide by me and taunt me for my greed and lust.So long happiness hello dark despair and guilt. Maybe someday things will change, but I'm not holding my breath.......